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to me through repetition. none of that practice makes perfect bullsh!t, -> for me, moving forward it is repetition creates competency. precision in language is what i prefer, and to tell you the truth the whole practicing my way to perfection, cliché has always rubbed me the wrong way. there was always a nagging feeling in the back of my head that i could never practice my way to perfection and would always be able to to fall back on a big fat juicy rationalization, namely at least i am making progress. be that as it may, before i dive too deeply into learning to speak the language of empathy.

SIC!
Six Thousand Two Hundred and Nine days clean!
Congrats on 17 years and Keep Coming Back

so empathy never seemed to come naturally to me, i can say that without any hesitation or reservations. i was socialized or cultured into believing that only weak and feeble persons needed my empathy, and even then it was sympathy and pity that i was taught to give them. empathy certainly was not in my repertoire of things to give when i came to recovery. everything could be fixed, if one just stopped whining about it, got off their lazy fat ass and moved forward with their lives. barring that, a quick dip into a chemical vacation would relive the pain, at least in the here and now. BOOM, no empathy needed just a quick dismissal and all was well.
so hearing that even one member had similar feelings and was struggling to find the spiritual direction the others in the group seemed to live without effort, made me more attentive to what i could become. even today i find myself slipping back into my “get over it and move along” attitude, i have to allow myself the freedom to go there, see what the result will be, -- isolation and alienation: mine -- and return to a repetition of living the spiritual principle of empathy. see i am learning.

∞ DT ∞