Blog entry for:

what do i want my life to look like today? that is an excellent question and one i have been twisting about for the past 6 months or so. the problem i have is not that i am unwilling to do the footwork necessary to make my life better, but rather what it is i want to do. the time has come to sit down and take an inventory of exactly what i want.
part of that inventory is already done, i want to remain clean and continue my growth in recovery. i also know hat footwork i need to do to accomplish that desire -- continue doing those things that got me clean to start with. i also know that i want to grow in my personal and romantic relationships. here to i already have clues as to what i need to do -- let myself become an open, honest and caring individual by continuing my growth in recovery. the problem i am having is in my professional and financial life -- i still have no clue as to what i want to be when i grow-up! i know what my talents and abilities are and am having some fear about putting myself out in the job marketplace to see what happens. in fact, i have been unwilling to even begin that footwork. i am afraid of rejection, and leaving the comfortable situation where i am currently employed. but of course i am not getting paid what i feel i am worth so then i get resentful at myself for not moving forward in this respect.
well the reading this morning outlines the exact process for resolving this dilemma -- inventory, investigate, talk with my sponsor and do IT! so the time has come for me to put-up or shut-up and do something about it.
∞ DT ∞