Blog entry for:

is not always important, so long as the focus remains on the primary purpose of the group. i chose to be a part of a group conscience last night, and as part of that process, unanimous consent was reached, on what for me, was a very contentious issue and one close to my heart. the amazing part, is that although i feel very strongly about the direction the group is taking, said less than fifty words during the thirty minutes of discussion. i am still more than a bit ticked off, that the discussion had to happen at all, but it is part of a battle i am going to initiate against the entitlement issues, that we as a group continue to enable. i will not go on about it here, as i have yet to get a clear direction, but it has become something close to my heart and it basically goes to the notion that some addicts need additional rights to be present in the rooms. that somehow they deserve additional considerations, at the expense of all others, BECAUSE of the consequences of the choices they made in the past.
that is, however, enough on my latest soapbox for now.
i am glad there were members here when i got clean. i am also glad that they did not treat me with kid gloves and sugar coat and cushion me from the reality of my situation. they were blunt, direct and exact in their comments and their suggestions, and more than once pissed me off enough for me to say, i will show those fVCckers, how wrong they are, I CAN DO IT MY WAY! what i learned as a result of that experience, was how correct they were, that although i chafe under the yoke of authority, sometimes, those who have been here longer than me, just might have a nugget of experience or wisdom, that i NEED to stay clean today.
times have changed and now i am becoming one of those rude, direct and assertive crusty old-timers, and i hear others whining about how i need to have more diplomatic, especially when dealing with those who i i judge to be acting over-entitled. after all, i might just drive someone away to using if i do not sugarcoat and play all sunshine and light. well the truth is certainly the truth, and wrapping it up in nice phrases and diplomacy does not change it, so they are, more than likely correct in that regard. not because i might drive them away, because it is the next right thing to do and my battle needs to be waged on a different level, not personally against the members of the overly entitled class that we have created. strange, how most of those who do not seem to stay clean lately, belong to that very class, and i am beginning wonder if the group as a whole is part of that process as well, by cushioning the blow of life on life's terms, may be we set them up for relapse. perhaps we need to go back to the old values, of making them stand on their own two feet from the very beginning, by taking care of their responsibilities and not shifting them to the group in general. after all, the seventh tradition is not just for groups to live by today.
however interesting this may be, i too, have to support myself. so it is time to get rolling on my morning. it is a great day to be clean and to have a new notion or two in my head as well.

∞ DT ∞