Blog entry for:

direction, and peace, unlike lions and tigers and bears, are three things i CHOOSE to seek, on a daily basis. the problem is that my spiritual path does not allow for a sentient being as some sort of “higher power.” over the course of my recovery, especially since my last ELEVENTH STEP, i have worked with the notion that the POWER that fuels my recovery, is neither sentient nor powerful, IT just is. as such IT does not have a “will” per se, but life through that POWER, does provide me the opportunities i need to get what i need and even what i desire. i often say that through meditation i “hear” the voice of that POWER, but that is merely a figure of speech to describe my experience in a manner that makes it approachable to others.
i have no doubts that the resources i expended in attending my Uncle's celebration of life, was exactly what i needed to do. there was no booming voice, clap of thunder or mysterious happenings surrounding my decision to go, i just “knew” that bit was the next right thing to do, regardless of the cost. it was important for me to be there and even more important that i had the desire to be there and spend the entire time, with my family, instead of isolating in my motel room to finish my book. in fact, even though i have not finished my book, i discovered when i got home that my significant other has plans for Tuesday evening, which will give me ample opportunity to dive in and finish reading it. a HIGHER POWER's will for me? perhaps. what i do know is that this morning, as i prepare to get up, shower off and scrape the five day old beard off my face that i am at peace? i know that i am on the correct path and that today can bring me more of the clarity, direction and peace that i seek on a daily basis.

∞ DT ∞