Blog entry for:

my FAITH by listening.
TAKE THREE -- just one of those mornings where everything has been a bit more difficult, than it should be. if i was one of those who looked for and believed in signs, i would be running back to bed, pulling the covers over my head and not moving until tomorrow. instead, i will just persevere and see what happens to come next. sometime today i will need to test out my debit card, as it ran through a wash and dry cycle, that i do not have enough FAITH in, to believe that it still works.
i had written a piece about how meditation has replaced prayer in my life, as a result of the spiritual paradigm shift in STEP ELEVEN in this last step cycle.i also had written about how i pray exactly twice a day, to ask for and express my gratitude for the ability to stay clean, just for today. something outside of me, provides that power, and whether or not i CHOOSE acknowledge IT, IT is certainly part of this spiritual path i am walking upon. by asking for the power to stay clean, i am working through a FAITH based solution to the problem of addiction, even though it has been quite some time, since i had the desire to use, i know what happens to addicts like me, who decide that for whatever reason, it is time to move along.
i am certain that when i stop, clear my mind and just be still, the answers i used to seek in prayer will come to me. oh, there is no burning bush, and the revelations are not accompanied by claps of thunder, bright lights and a background of angelic choir singing a resolved C major chord. no they are just a “feeling” that i get and across the course of my experience, since i started to TRUST feelings that i arrive at in this manner, i am seeing that i can have FAITH, that is certainly the next right thing to do.
anyhow, i need to get moving right along, to see what i hosed in the laundry this morning. i will be a bit more conscientious of what i am doing, where i am going and what is happening around me, as my lack of attention to my feelings and the details, ended up possibly very badly for me.

∞ DT ∞