Blog entry for:

yes one of the gifts of long term recovery, is watching the FNG morph into an old-timer. yes i could be all spiritual and be all grateful for getting to see this process and write tomes about what this means for my life and my recovery. the operative word here is COULD. i will acknowledge that one of my favorite parts of staying clean, is getting to watch the recovery of others and when called upon, foster their growth through sponsorship. which brings me to a tale of two peers this morning.

Reese F,
Congrats on NINETEEN (19) years clean.
Thank you for allowing to be a part of your recovery.

there often comes a time when stuff, especially relationships are not working out for one or both of the participants. my sponsor relationship with Reese had reached that point a while ago, and i have only fired one sponsee, although i have been fired by many. i often hole on to relationships, out of FEAR and the FEAR here , was no one could give my friend what he needed to progress forward in his recovery. i might not have been giving him that with the physical separation, but at least he had a lifeline. when we sat down and spoke, we both saw that there certainly was someone who may be willing and that had something Reese wanted in his neck of the woods. it was sad to let go, but in the long run, it was more than likely better for the both of us.
i promised two peers and that story may begin this morning. i am meeting with a man who asked me to sponsor him on Monday night. generally i have no issues and the answer is: “yes, of course.” sitting down the first time to go over expectations is a mere formality. this morning i am not certain of the outcome. most of the time, i know very little of a person's history when i get asked to be a sponsor. the man i am seeing this morning has been “around” the fellowship for at least five years and i have seen him in other settings as well. the problem i see, is that i have already judged him and think that i “know” him. my FEAR is that i will be unable or unwilling to let go of what i think i know and be open-minded to discovering who he is and what i can give him. we will see as i now have to run off to pick him up and find out where that relationship may go, just for today.

∞ DT ∞