Blog entry for:

to be a recovering addict! alright, i have to fess up, i always cringe when one of my peers identifies as a recovering addict. it has rubbed me the wrong way, forever, and probably always will. i am an addict, plain and simple, no modifiers, catch-phrases or slogans need to be added to that descriptor of who and what i am. i know that once upon a time, i required words to soften the blow of the connotation of being an addict, but those days are well behind me. yet here i am starting off this exercise with that hated term.
my source material this morning, uses that term as a substitute for an addict who chooses recovery, today. it certainly is more succinct and pithy. catchy or not, when i bring it into context of living a life of active recovery, it does make sense. each and every day, i GET to choose what path i may want to take: active addiction, mere abstinence or recovery. although it may appear that there are many shades of gray between that tripartite path, there really are not, at least in my mind, as each state is mutually exclusive of the other two. it would be nice to say that the first choice has not been on my mind for a very long time, and yet, i seriously considered a bit of a “recovery vacation” earlier this year when diagnosed medical issues, when suddenly last summer they were revealed. the middle path is one that pops up from time to time, but i have not been clean this long to put myself into misery. so my default choice: active daily recovery, rules the roost, hence, one might easily say that i am a recovering addict.
this morning., i am way off my game as i had a very long medical diagnostic test done at zero dark o'clock. because i am in recovery and respect myself, i am more than interested in taking care of myself, physically as well as emotionally and spiritually. which means active surveillance and listening to my medical professionals. from here on out, this day will play out like many of my Saturdays as i walk through what may come. it is a good day to be clean and a better day to be aware that just for today, i can be more than just an addict, i can be happy, serene, sane and yes, in recovery.

∞ DT ∞