🦅 my greatest 🎆
Posted: Tue, Oct 28, 2025 10:24:25 AM
freedom is not outside myself but within. wow, my source material was like getting hit by a ton of bricks this morning. i have yet to write the coda to my THIRD STEP and now i am glad i waited, as what i heard this morning, wraps it up quite neatly and nicely. what was it that tripped my trigger? the notion that i am in a self-made prison and that is precisely what i need to have obliterated by the POWER that fuels my recovery. the first brick of that prison was put down the day i started to believe i was broken and needed to hide who i was, and was built brick by brick by me taking on expectations from my culture, from popular media, from my parents and from the filters through which i viewed the world. although the recovery process destroyed most of it, i still remained locked in, until my last FIFTH STEP and now i am more than ready to finish that destruction, i am ready to be freed.
right here and right now, i am kind of celebrating my week in NFL football and getting ready to obsess about how to repeat my triumphs. the next hour or so, will be fantasy football obsession as i had to alter my plan of the day, when i received updated information from my spouse. once upon a time, even as late as yesterday, i might have been a bit pissed off at having to change my plan of the day. i am not sure what changed in the past twenty-four hours. for all i know i can revert back in the next twenty-four. what i think is going on, is that i am coming out on the other side of my THIRD STEP. as when i finish it this afternoon and share with my sponse tomorrow, i may actually be able to surrender the vestiges of my self-made prison into the care of the POWER that fuels my recovery, by moving on in my step work or implementing any suggestions that my sponse may give me.
it is more than ironic that this cynic can express even that modicum of optimism today. something is certainly going on and i am not going to over-think it or analyze it to death. just for today i will go with the flow and see where it takes me. i have FAITH that the process will reveal more, even if i do not think that may be possible, just for today.
right here and right now, i am kind of celebrating my week in NFL football and getting ready to obsess about how to repeat my triumphs. the next hour or so, will be fantasy football obsession as i had to alter my plan of the day, when i received updated information from my spouse. once upon a time, even as late as yesterday, i might have been a bit pissed off at having to change my plan of the day. i am not sure what changed in the past twenty-four hours. for all i know i can revert back in the next twenty-four. what i think is going on, is that i am coming out on the other side of my THIRD STEP. as when i finish it this afternoon and share with my sponse tomorrow, i may actually be able to surrender the vestiges of my self-made prison into the care of the POWER that fuels my recovery, by moving on in my step work or implementing any suggestions that my sponse may give me.
it is more than ironic that this cynic can express even that modicum of optimism today. something is certainly going on and i am not going to over-think it or analyze it to death. just for today i will go with the flow and see where it takes me. i have FAITH that the process will reveal more, even if i do not think that may be possible, just for today.
∞ DT ∞