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i can start to see them as opportunities for growth, not as good or bad.one of the toughest things i am learning to do, is to detach value judgements from the events of my day and especially the feelings that i have, in reaction to those events. yesterday was quite a day full of opportunities for growth and it is my desire that today is not quite as full as yesterday.
of course, i will not pray for that sort of stuff, as i have discovered that asking for events and things in such a non-specific manner often leads to consequences i am ill-prepared to handle.
what was it about yesterday that i found so challenging? without going into specific details, i had three interactions with others, that were not to my liking at all. one of them, as i think about it now, was certainly my stuff and not theirs, and as i sit back and put it into context i realize that even though i DID NOT want to, doing was something that was the next right thing. in fact, judging my behavior in that matter as well as the other two, i was following the spiritual path and giving someone i really do not like at this time, the love and concern i would want is not hypocritical. i treated them with the caring respect that i would like to have myself.
the other two? well they were lessons in tolerance and patience. both of them demonstrate in my opinion, blame-shifting, minimization and living in the fantasy world of untreated addiction. i would not trade places with either of them, and as the time progresses, i will have to make some tough decisions of when to say no. not because i feel “bad” or “good” about them, but because i can no longer be a part of enabling them to live in a world that they seem to think revolves around their needs, wants and desires. their stuff is not mine today and as i move forward into this morning, i am certain that as i draw the boundaries and make them better defined, at least on of them will feel “bad” because of my actions.
anyhow, enough of this rambling and babbling, it is a good day, i have lots to do and i want to be more than i was yesterday. as this day progresses i will do my best tom seize the opportunities for growth that comes my way and learn whatever i can from them, after all, if i am not growing, i am going!

∞ DT ∞