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without my favorite meeting? okay, i get that the primary purpose of every group is to carry the message to the still suffering addict. i also get, that the newcomer is the most important person at any meeting because my peers and i can only keep what we have, by giving it away. what does not follow is the assumption that the newcomer is the still suffering addict, and to focus solely on carrying a message to the newest potential members, misses the entire point, sometimes the still suffering addict, may just be the member in the room with the most clean time. which brings me to the question i opened this little exercise up with, where would i be!?
for me, i have a place where i can share my stuff, it just happens to be my home group, which is the sort of meeting i never believed i would take to. i was quite closed-minded about what i felt were “special” meetings, that any meeting that was only men, would be a “he-man women haters club.” well, lo and behold, that is now my home group and has been for quite some time, because there the message is that the still suffering addict, who needs to be reached may not be the newest of the new, that just walked into the rooms. my home group, and i do use the possessive with emphasis, is a place where i not only feel safe sharing my stuff, but i also feel welcomed and esteemed by the attendees, and i hope they feel the same way. the group being very small at this time, makes it hard for the newcomer to hide against the back wall, so they are thrust into our welcoming arms. unfortunately, the parade of newcomers passes in and out of doors as well. there is no special attraction that keeps them coming back, and it is tough to watch their suffering continue. and yet, other than reaching out to them and encouraging them to keep coming back there is little more i can do.
i know that i have peers, that focus on the newcomer and do all that they can, to insure that the newcomer feels welcomed. for me, i feel it is my job to carry a message about the reality of what it means to me, to be living a program of active recovery, and what life is like once the desire to use has been lifted and the desire to stay clean is paramount in my mind.the wondrous part of this program, and it is not advanced recovery, is that there si so much more than just “not using,” and this is the message i try and carry to the still suffering addict, regardless of how long they have been clean.
life is good today, and i have been clean all day, just to throw in a bon mot or two, in for good measure. today i live in the moment, and when i attend my next meeting, i can take inventory of what it is that i am sharing and is it a credit to the fellowship that has given me this new way of living, or not.

∞ DT ∞