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my expectations instead of in the world as it actually is, led to my warning and subsequent release from the dream job i had landed. i expected to be allowed to work in a manner that i was quite used to working in and in the end, that lack of work ethic sunk me. as a result i have a job that pays me better and has yet to demand more of me than i am able to give. that does not mean i get to return to those end days at TTEC, when most of my days were spend looking for a job and training myself on how to write code, once again. everything may not be coming up daisies for me, but neither is the storm of job uncertainty looming over my head. so far everyone has assured me i have a job for another six months, although i have yet to get the official notification, so i have to keep peeking at the job market and letting go of any expectation i may have, which means a few hours of work tomorrow morning.
i am very lazed out this morning and have yet to get my ass in gear. i have very little motivation to pick up the pace, as there is nowhere i have to be until four o'clock this afternoon. nevertheless, enforced chill is not part of how i seem to roll these days and i am already working towards “filling up” the empty hours of this day, instead of just rolling with the flow. my keyboard did survive the Gatorade soaking, with the exception that it no longer is lit. is that enough for me to pitch it into the recycle bin and buy a replacement? well almost, BUT, i certainly can live without “glowing keys.”
so what are my expectations on this highly unplanned day? turkey with most of my immediate family, football at home, a bit of food preparation, certainly a workout and maybe, just maybe the chance to let go of the selfish and self-centered behaviors that may grace my afternoon. as this long weekend unfolds, Christmas decorations on our front lawn are certainly part of the plan as well as some time with my friend Jack.
i know this is a bit scattered today and perhaps that is fitting as i have been pounding out the code for the past five days straight, fixing what given to me and getting ready to add to release ready version that is going to production on Tuesday. i know that i want to win my Fantasy Football match-ups this weekend to secure spots in the playoffs. before i wrap this up, a Happy Thanksgiving to one and all. i certainly hope that each and every one of my readers find something to be thankful for today. just for today, i am grateful that my recovery journey, has brought me to where i am today.

∞ DT ∞