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Sun, May 21, 2023 09:34:38 AM


🤔 facing 🤪
posted: Sun, May 21, 2023 09:34:38 AM

 

feelings with optimism is, IMHO, certainly a strange pairing. even when i was using and doing my best to scrapes off the highs and lows of my emotional life, i did not look at feelings as items over which to be optimistic or pessimistic about. even before i grew into the place where i stopped judging feelings as “good” or “bad,” i had no notion of being optimistic or the converse about what feelings i might experience as i went through my day, hence the oddity of this source material title, was rather discordant to me, this morning.
moving beyond what i thought and into what i “heard” as i considered the content that went beyond the “odd” title, i had all sorts of “stuff” come up for me. starting with the notion that ALL feelings are temporary and NO ONE has ever died from a feeling. for me, the whole notion about what i feel and why i feel one way or another has moved beyond the stuff that affects me on a daily basis. for me, feelings just “are,” and my power comes in, on how i respond to any feeling that may arise. i often get amused by how much energy my peers put into dealing with feelings and i know that is part of the whole treatment industry as well. it is no wonder that the world seems to run on the question of what to do with any feelings that one may have, and i know from my experience, that i , too, fell into that trap for a very long time in my life. when i grew enough in my recovery to tolerate feelings, i started to see that i truly had very little power over what i felt. of sure, i could go do things i enjoyed and i most of the time, i feel “happy” when i do so and in the past, if i had an unexpected feeling while doing so, i felt angry and pissed off. once i let go of expecting this feeling or that, i found myself in a much more serene spot and felt better about who i am and the direction my life is taking.
today, before the pall of smoke from the Canadian wild fire takes over my local environs, i think it is time to get out and run my feet off. i might “expect” to feel accomplished or satisfied after i do so. i, however, do NOT give myself permission to expect to feel anything and whatever i feel when i am done, will be what it was meant to be. today and just for today, i will allow myself to feel whatever emotions come down the pike and be thankful that i CAN experience the full range of human emotions these days, after decades of living behind an emotional wall, keeping everyone else at bay and swallowing the poison of my frozen feelings.

∞ DT ∞

 

djtConsulting Brand
The views expressed on this page are solely the opinion of the author.
While the author is a member of a 12 Step recovery fellowship, these writings are not intended to endorse or express the published wisdom of any fellowship.
These writings are not meant to be socially or politically correct, and if you take issue with any opinions expressed, please seek the guidance of someone wiser than me.

Another Look!

∞ keeping in touch with who i am, where i came from, and where i am going ∞ 413 words ➥ Sunday, May 21, 2006 by: donnot
∞ i do not stop being an addict after i have been clean awhile. ∞ 444 words ➥ Monday, May 21, 2007 by: donnot
α when i came to this fellowship found others like myself, people who understood me and whom i could understand … 388 words ➥ Wednesday, May 21, 2008 by: donnot
Σ at meetings, i see how different people work their program … 476 words ➥ Thursday, May 21, 2009 by: donnot
∇ i still need to identify with other addicts, even after thousands of days in a row clean ∇ 474 words ➥ Friday, May 21, 2010 by: donnot
¹ meetings keep me in touch with where i have been ¹ 680 words ➥ Saturday, May 21, 2011 by: donnot
§ if i want the lives i see others living § 568 words ➥ Monday, May 21, 2012 by: donnot
→ no longer do i feel like an alien or a stranger, wherever i go ↵ 446 words ➥ Tuesday, May 21, 2013 by: donnot
¢ every meeting reminds me that i will never be cured, ¢ 558 words ➥ Wednesday, May 21, 2014 by: donnot
¡ keep coming back ! 498 words ➥ Thursday, May 21, 2015 by: donnot
⦕ in many ways, ⦕ 820 words ➥ Saturday, May 21, 2016 by: donnot
≎ i am at home ≎ 644 words ➥ Sunday, May 21, 2017 by: donnot
🚧 attending meetings 🚔 681 words ➥ Monday, May 21, 2018 by: donnot
👾 feeling like 👽 545 words ➥ Tuesday, May 21, 2019 by: donnot
😈 reminding myself 😇 530 words ➥ Thursday, May 21, 2020 by: donnot
🤨 others like myself 🤬 544 words ➥ Friday, May 21, 2021 by: donnot
🌨 i do not 🌤 573 words ➥ Saturday, May 21, 2022 by: donnot
💡 when i realize 💡 406 words ➥ Tuesday, May 21, 2024 by: donnot
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☯ The Tao that can be spoken is not the eternal Tao ☯

THE TAO TEH KING, OR THE TAO AND ITS CHARACTERISTICS
by Lao-Tse
Translated by James Legge

Book 1

1) If we could renounce our sageness and discard our wisdom, it would
be better for the people a hundredfold. If we could renounce our benevolence
and discard our righteousness, the people would again become filial
and kindly. If we could renounce our artful contrivances and discard
our (scheming for) gain, there would be no thieves nor robbers.