Blog entry for:

...i need to stay alert for opportunities to practice my program.
and what exactly does that mean. the most telling line in the entry this morning was that we practice our program differently after five years clean then we did at five months clean. and for that is certainly true, without a doubt! i would like to think that i have not grown complacent in practicing my program, and that may be true. the converse may also be true and having a reminder on at least an annual basis (although i believe there is more than this entry in the JFT cycle that speaks to topic from a few different angles.
well how about a quickie? and no i do not mean that you silly people, i am talking a brief inventory of how i practice my program today, after two trips through ALL twelve steps, some exposure to service and three thousand two hundred and thirteen days clean.

1. i still concede as truth to my inner self that i am an addict and my life is mostly unmanageable
2. i still have HOPE that i can be restored to further sanity, but i am not as nearly as nutz as i was at three hundred and two days clean
3. i still have a bit of a problem turning over my whole will and my life into the care of my HIGHER POWER and that may be why i am stalled on my fourth step
4. have not done a formal fourth step in several years, and am currently stalled on writing this step, so it figures i am overdue for steps five, six, seven, and eight again
9. cleaning-up my amends list as the opportunity presents itself, the amends left on that list are for people i can no longer find
10. i have been taking an inventory on a daily basis so my tenth step, and have been for quite some time and have no desire to stop that!
11. morning meditation one of the joys of my day and as i have practiced this particular skill, my understanding of myself and my place in the world has increased and changed
12. and finally the hardest step to quantify. am i really doing my best to practice all these principles in my daily life and doing what i can to carry our message of HOPE to others? well, i have step ten to gauge my progress here, but my efforts on this step seem to always be changing, depending on my spiritual condition

so i guess i know where my program is at today and where i need to concentrate my efforts. off to the real world to deal with i need to and thanks for all the fish!

∞ DT ∞