๐ taking the time ๐ฆ
Posted: Mon, Jun 2, 2025 06:42:59 AM
to consciously reflect on the abundance recovery has brought to my life. most of the time, i take what recovery has given me for granted. after a minute clean and learning how to live my recovery, i have got the notion that all that i have, i rightfully deserve. after all, i worked the steps, i serve my peers in the fellowship, i attended all those meetings, i stayed clean no matter what and i do this gig day in and day out, by choice. all of that is certainly true and cannot be argued with, my efforts of recovery have resulted in a life beyond my wildest expectations. unlike many of my peers, i do not see recovery as something that is “GOD given.” that does not mean that i disrespect their spiritual views, i just do not ascribe to them myself.
all of that does not mean, however, that i should minimize the affect recovery has had on my life and live in a state where i am far from conscious of what could have been, had i taken a different path to this slice of time. i am quite certain, had i not stumbled into legal trouble and forced to get clean, i would have never found any sort of recovery. i certainly would not have the willingness to live the sort of life i have today and if i was stay alive and free from the justice system, i would be the miserable wretch i was when i fell into the rooms. the gifts of recovery i most often take for granted are not the external things i have earned, but rather the changes inherent in the process of working the steps, including the ability to love, honor and respect myself. i may not treat my body like some sort of temple, but i do respect the fact that IF i want to be better, i have to work a program of recovery and find the ways and means to live better.
the desire to live better, is the direct result of recovery and i have to remember that i did not always have that desire. to be richer, better looking and famous, maybe, but those were pipe-dreams i desired without wanting to do any work. i still may want all of that, but realistically i know that what i have is more important than the smoke and mirrors of my fantasies. as i prepare to head out for my daily workout, i do feel a bit more grateful for having a life that includes the ways and means to be a bit stronger, healthier, self-assured and yes the ability to love myself and others, just for today.
all of that does not mean, however, that i should minimize the affect recovery has had on my life and live in a state where i am far from conscious of what could have been, had i taken a different path to this slice of time. i am quite certain, had i not stumbled into legal trouble and forced to get clean, i would have never found any sort of recovery. i certainly would not have the willingness to live the sort of life i have today and if i was stay alive and free from the justice system, i would be the miserable wretch i was when i fell into the rooms. the gifts of recovery i most often take for granted are not the external things i have earned, but rather the changes inherent in the process of working the steps, including the ability to love, honor and respect myself. i may not treat my body like some sort of temple, but i do respect the fact that IF i want to be better, i have to work a program of recovery and find the ways and means to live better.
the desire to live better, is the direct result of recovery and i have to remember that i did not always have that desire. to be richer, better looking and famous, maybe, but those were pipe-dreams i desired without wanting to do any work. i still may want all of that, but realistically i know that what i have is more important than the smoke and mirrors of my fantasies. as i prepare to head out for my daily workout, i do feel a bit more grateful for having a life that includes the ways and means to be a bit stronger, healthier, self-assured and yes the ability to love myself and others, just for today.
∞ DT ∞