Blog entry for:

...dirty about my life or my lifestyle -- i am living clean, and am grateful to be doing so at last. living clean, living a program, being an addict in recovery, all of those terms feel synonymous (not antonymous) to me. although as i come to think about it, i could make a differentiation in my mind, but is it really worth the effort? i mean really, if i equate them all to the highest standard then for me, there is no confusion. that standard you ask? well living the program of recovery that i have been given, i mean really living it, putting the steps into action in my life, applying the spiritual principles in all of their various flavors and shadings, and doing so to the best of my ability, right now, and in the next moment, and the next and the next. sounds like a hard task, and it could be, if i allowed myself to beat myself up about the little slips into unacceptable behavior. and i am not talking about stealing from my clients, nor am i speaking about pretending i have cancer, or anything that i have seen members who purport to have recovery attempt to get away with, they nay be able to live with themselves after such acts, but i know that i could not and boy oh boy would i be getting together with my sponsor to figure out what i was thinking. not that i am some kind of saint, or recovery guru, but i do have a sense of right and wrong, and i do catch myself stumbling from time to time, and i even catch myself after the fact, after which i have to face the consequences.
anyhow, what i do or do not do is hardly what i need to go on and on and on about, i just need to say this final word:
…i do my best and as a human being it is all that is all that can be expected, so off to the races and let me see what i can do to live my life according to the priciples that i have been given.

∞ DT ∞