Blog entry for:

emotional pain with material things, sure things certainly can make me happy, NOT! well things, especially bright, shiny new and fast ones, can certainly make me feel different. different, is after all, better than what i was feeling before i pulled out my wallet, but different is not necessarily a good thing and most of the time not happiness at all. more than one spiritual tradition points out that things will not bring any sort of emotional or spiritual growth in and of itself, and yet the culture that i have lived in, since the dawn of my time, tells me something entirely different, hence the notion that i can buy my way to happiness. after all, all the commercials show smiling happy people after they purchased this item of that, down to the type of sexual lubricant and prescription medicine i can choose form, so it is no wonder that i, as an AMERICAN in this day and age, struggle with such an attachment to the material world of creature comforts. the saying before the advent of memes was “he who dies with the most toys, wins!” everything i have been taught to do is wrapped around how many things i can accumulate and with that pile of stuff how can i not be happy?
do not get me wrong, i am not about to renounce all my things, give all my assets away to charity, shave my head, don a hair shirt and run off to a cave in the Himalayas and ponder the mysteries of life the universe and everything. i am however, acutely aware of the purchase i contemplated on Tuesday and consummated on Wednesday, and wondering if the rationale behind that purchase was really what i think it was. was it an attempt at retail therapy? well if it was, it certainly is one quite deferred as it will be another week before it shows up in my life, and i still can say no way José, send it back! my reasoning was, that this computer, was over four years old, had some “issues” and i was worth a brand new and very fast workstation. i am still trying to figure that one out, but i know if i do not go and pick it up, it will go away and i will be just as happy and secure as i am right now without my latest and greatest toy.
anyhow, not a whole lot more i can say, except that when i find myself feeling the tug of the cultural tow towards rampant consumerism, i need to ask myself “is this really something that i need or is this something i want to salve my aching soul?” sometimes, i can even buy something for no good reason at all, simply out of the desire to have it, and that is a point of view i do n ot consider very often. maybe, just maybe,. my new computer that has yet to arrive, is simply one of those items i want, do not need, and there is no angst to be relieved. you know what, today i do not care, what i do care about is the fact that IF i take a shower, get in my car, drive south to the office and apply myself for the eight and a half hours i am there, i will continue to get what i always got, a paycheck that i can use to make my life more materially comfortable and i am all about that today.

∞ DT ∞