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as i was leaving a personal commitment to help a still suffering addict, i was accosted by a former peer from the program. my first inclination was to walk out and leave the requester in the dust, as i have a few personal issues with his behavior, i gave him a very tentative maybe about comi9nmg over to talk with him today., and have been considering whether or not i would fulfill that request. that answer has yet to come to me, i have however decided to do what is in my heart when the time arrives, which may just be to put aside my feelings, expectation and our past history and answer the call of that still-suffering addict. before i get into what meetings mean to me, i need to shout out to a couple of my peers, who continue to proves that this program does work:

Ryan B,
THREE years clean.
Way to keep coming back, Just for Today.

Jayme S,
Eighteen (18) years clean.
Thank you for being a part of my recovery.

it has been many years since i did a meeting a day for ninety days in a row, to say otherwise would be untrue. it also has probably been quite a bit of time since i even did a meeting a day for thirty days or even seven days consecutively. it just has never been a great NEED for me to “re-commit” to my program in such a fashion. i have peers, who do, do such things. i can understand why one would want to do that and the day may come where i NEED to do one of those meeting cycles, but that day is not today. of course, that being said, i can say that i am an avid believer in meetings, and attend three a week on a very consistent basis. Saturday morning, Sunday evening and Tuesday evening, to be exact. i have found that three meetings a week, is a good number for me. it keeps me connected to my local fellowship, in contact with my peers, and grounded in the notion that i may be powerless over addiction, but i do not lack the power to facilitate my recovery.
as the third disturbing realization says, i AM responsible for my recovery, which i take to mean that it is up to me to facilitate a program of active recovery. which has come to mean that i have to plan and implement an active program of recovery. that plan? to take care of the daily stuff and make sure that i have a connection to something more than me, other addicts in recovery as well as the POWER that fuels my recovery. meeting provide me that connection and as i have grown in my understanding about who i am and my value to my fellowship and myself, i am also seeing the value of my peers, my acquaintances and fellow travelers along this road, as well. they keep me grounded in the new reality as it is being revealed to me.
so my answer is still a BIG maybe, but leaning more and more towards making the journey and going to a meeting this afternoon! it is time however for munching on some luncheon, TTFN

∞ DT ∞