π‘ taking personal inventory, π
Posted: Mon, Aug 26, 2019 07:48:28 AM
on a daily basis, is something i do these days, but perhaps, as i did with my STEP 11 a few months ago, maybe it is time to **step** this part of my recovery program up a bit. i can that without a doubt, every single time, i have committed to reinforcing my commitment to a **maintenance** step, the results have been to my liking. the question then becomes, HOW would i do this?
stepping up for STEP ELEVEN was easy, as i set my goal for a minimum of twenty minutes of sitting every morning. meditation may not have com e easy fro me, but once i practiced it enough, it was no longer so hard to do. even though i have taken to “sitting” each night to review my day, i very seldom ever really shut down as i do in the morning. that is not necessarily a bad thing, as what needs to come up and be looked at, is given that chance, but more often than not, my mind drifts off into one fantasy or another. so i give up after five minutes or so, and head on off to bed. i do fall asleep quickly, so i know that what i am doing, is at least a start, but with the reading this morning, i am getting the notion that i need to set a minimum time to look at my day and allow myself to be quiet after that part is complete.
i am not averse to looking at my day with a critical eye, after all, i am my most vocal and active critic. nor am i avers to “sitting” and allowing myself to sort through the events and actions of my day in the “real” world. the only thing stopping me from moving forward with my plan, is just a resistance to changing up my habits, maintaining the inertia so to speak and being a bit, well more than a bit, on the lazy side. to all of a sudden commit to something new, takes a bit of determination, or at least THAT IS WHAT I TELL MYSELF. the fact is that i dove into my STEP ELEVEN changes, because i was having difficulty moving through my THIRD STEP. i have yet to finish that step work, so maybe a re-commitment to STEP 10 will provide the impetus i need to move forward. on that note i think i will post this to the interwebs and head on down to the office to see what i can accomplish with a bit of being a team player.
stepping up for STEP ELEVEN was easy, as i set my goal for a minimum of twenty minutes of sitting every morning. meditation may not have com e easy fro me, but once i practiced it enough, it was no longer so hard to do. even though i have taken to “sitting” each night to review my day, i very seldom ever really shut down as i do in the morning. that is not necessarily a bad thing, as what needs to come up and be looked at, is given that chance, but more often than not, my mind drifts off into one fantasy or another. so i give up after five minutes or so, and head on off to bed. i do fall asleep quickly, so i know that what i am doing, is at least a start, but with the reading this morning, i am getting the notion that i need to set a minimum time to look at my day and allow myself to be quiet after that part is complete.
i am not averse to looking at my day with a critical eye, after all, i am my most vocal and active critic. nor am i avers to “sitting” and allowing myself to sort through the events and actions of my day in the “real” world. the only thing stopping me from moving forward with my plan, is just a resistance to changing up my habits, maintaining the inertia so to speak and being a bit, well more than a bit, on the lazy side. to all of a sudden commit to something new, takes a bit of determination, or at least THAT IS WHAT I TELL MYSELF. the fact is that i dove into my STEP ELEVEN changes, because i was having difficulty moving through my THIRD STEP. i have yet to finish that step work, so maybe a re-commitment to STEP 10 will provide the impetus i need to move forward. on that note i think i will post this to the interwebs and head on down to the office to see what i can accomplish with a bit of being a team player.
∞ DT ∞