Blog entry for:

my recovery, just for today! okay seed is done, goodwill is on my mind and so is the fact that i am posting this much later than usual. needless to say, it has been a busy morning and finally finding the minutes to pause and reflect on what this day, is where i am right now. as i think of my weekend, i am so glad that i took the time to make a road trip yesterday, to see the man who has called me his sponsor for greatest number of days in a row. although we never made a meeting, enjoying his company and letting another sponsee, see what the years of sponsorship may do for a relationship, feels like that was the correct course of action. i have already faded a bit of heat on social media, because i kept my plans on the down-low, and there may be another explanation or three yet to come. i certainly could have made it a caravan and brought up a whole lot more guys with me. for me, it was about spending time and celebrating with a friend and not a whole big production number. today i have no regrets about going in that direction as the evening was very enjoyable and intimate. i am not the most social person in the world, in fact, i often say i am a “social retard.” it is true i am better than i once was and as the days roll by and i act as if i am comfortable in a group of people, that will certainly may change. in fact i am stepping out to a cigar party to watch the Super Bowl this afternoon, so once more i get a bit of practice.
coming back to the part of living in my recovery, part of doing so, is keeping track of some clean date anniversaries. i have always believed that these milestones need to be acknowledged far and wide, so i have them on my calendar. each time i send a txt or make a phone call to one of my peers, who happen to be marking a milestone, i feel better, whether or not they choose to answer. it is all about me taking the time to do something for someone else and giving a little something back to those on which i depend. i am of the firm belief that my recovery is based on being connected to them and it is up to me to foster that connection. goodwill today means being a part of something larger, at least that is what i am feeling right now. with that thought on the top of my head, i think i will wrap this up and chill for a bit before i hit the “smoky” trail.

∞ DT ∞