not my addiction. well it has been another interesting twenty-four. i started on the eventful twenty-four paradigm, every day seems to be eventful these days, and it is more than likely the way it has always been, i am just getting better at noticing it. As is sit here waiting for the news on my little curb incident last night, i go back over how i got here. No i drove to the repair shop, i am talking about how i got to the place where i am more aware of what is going on around me and my reactions to that set of events. I can certainly tell you that even a year ago i would have misdeed most of what has gone on, , living the changes in me, as a result of the last set of steps has brought me to a place where everything seems to be important, sort of like watching some of my favorite shows, that every single action and word means something. It has been a tough place to be, as i feel like a “snowflake” with no way to temper the events of my day. It is a good thing and brings me around to the topic at hand, GOODWILL, and living a program of recovery.
When i do the next right thing without thinking about it, that is living a program. When I have to stop and consider that is also a symptom of living the program. When I react and do so poorly, well that is living in addiction. Over time, I reach that spot less and less often, and that is not my will, that is GOODWILL or the will of the POWER that fuels my recovery. As I was talking to a friend last night, what I wanted to say was to put on your big boy whitey-tighties and man up. I what I said instead was that there is a path out of the angst he was in and offered a suggestion or three. Anyhow i am back home, and the next right thing is to eat and get back to work. it is a great day to be clean even if i have to pay for entering a parking lot, far too quickly on oice. life goes on and today i have the resources to take care of my little goof-ups.
∞ DT ∞