Blog entry for:

so after an emotionally unstable week for me, i sit here this morning feeling excited about what is going on in my life, finally. i still have no direction to channel my passion, i am still an addict in recovery, i still have to deal with the million and one details that need to be taken care of between now and next week, but i have achieved some sort of peace with all of that stuff.
so out of the curse of my addiction i have received the blessing of recovery. i understand that today and am even more grateful for some of the stuff that entails. one of those blessings within in a blessing is that i have learned to trust people and in my darkest times i can reach out to those addicts with whom i have worked to build a relationship and share what is going on inside of me. the stuff that has been going on over the past week within me is not exactly for public consumption but if i had kept it inside i would have destroyed myself, my relationship and hurt the woman i have come to love. the program of recovery has blessed me with a bit of self-knowledge and the desire to find appropriate manners to get rid of my garbage. and do not get me wrong, what was going on was not necessarily garbage, but behaviors arising from that stuff would have been toxic waste.
you know i could and have asked why now, but the answer probably is why not now. i am taking my commitment to a new level and this stuff is better explored in the her and now, rather than six months down the line.
life is good today and the time has come to cut this short. before i go i want to thank the two addicts who helped me get this spot today, without you time and concern i would probably be off, running away once again.

∞ DT ∞