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well it seems to me that these two readings are leading up to something. how can i share my secrets with my sponsor if i lack TRUST? the answer is simple cannot and will not.

then the disease of addiction wins!

if i am ashamed of some dark or not so dark secret that i have been carrying i simply cannot recover. i will remain twisted and hurt with very little hope. it has been my experience that at least one person in this world should know everything about me. to date, that has been my sponsor. when i came into this journey, i trusted no one and as a result carried the shame of my behaviors. i was taught early on that this was a source of unnecessary PAIN. finding the courage to reveal my inner self and my inner turmoil in the short run was easier than holding on tightly to those parts of my past and present that i judge to be less than stellar. i am the cause of the continuing pain of SHAME. i use shame as a tool against myself and my ongoing spiritual growth. i no longer need be ashamed of who i am or was, i have tools for correcting my behaviors today and most of all, the trust necessary to reveal my inner shame. those tools allow me to dispell the shame and learn to live in the HERE ASND NOW.
-- DT --