δ where i was powerless over my addiction, i have found a Power greater than myself Δ
Posted: Mon, Jul 30, 2007 09:56:16 AM
that has helped me stop using.
once again i read this reading this morning and i thought about a constipation product commercial, guess i have yet to move out of my anal phase of development, and that i can accept today. since i have already shared about that aspect of this reading the time has come to move on. so the part of this reading that comes next to mind is the self-examination part of taking a daily inventory. yes i would avoid looking at myself, my behaviors and my feelings in active addiction, after all i already had enough exercises in futility back in those days.
in early recovery, i also deflected myself form looking at myself. in fact i skimmed through my first tenth step and never actually started the whole daily inventory thingy. in fact my first trip through the steps, ten, eleven and twelve were less than integrated into my life.
these days, however, i do take a daily inventory on a consistent basis. after writing it out for over three years, it became a part of my regular routine and remains so to this day. so i get to look at my crap, every evening. do i enjoy finding out what i did and did not do correctly everyday? well enjoyment would not be the word i would use, but necessity creates strange bedfellows. i really do not mind looking at my stuff, and i really enjoy getting rid of the daily frustrations that could lead to resentments. i do enjoy discovering the damage i have created and amending that damage promptly, so most of that stuff does not end up on my ninth step. most of all, i do enjoy discovering at least thing i am grateful every day. so after a bit of thought, i guess i do enjoy the self-examination that the daily tenth step entails. life is good this morning, now that i am no longer brain dead and well-rested. so off to meet my responsibilities. life does not stop, dang it, and i need to practice a spiritual principle or two.
once again i read this reading this morning and i thought about a constipation product commercial, guess i have yet to move out of my anal phase of development, and that i can accept today. since i have already shared about that aspect of this reading the time has come to move on. so the part of this reading that comes next to mind is the self-examination part of taking a daily inventory. yes i would avoid looking at myself, my behaviors and my feelings in active addiction, after all i already had enough exercises in futility back in those days.
in early recovery, i also deflected myself form looking at myself. in fact i skimmed through my first tenth step and never actually started the whole daily inventory thingy. in fact my first trip through the steps, ten, eleven and twelve were less than integrated into my life.
these days, however, i do take a daily inventory on a consistent basis. after writing it out for over three years, it became a part of my regular routine and remains so to this day. so i get to look at my crap, every evening. do i enjoy finding out what i did and did not do correctly everyday? well enjoyment would not be the word i would use, but necessity creates strange bedfellows. i really do not mind looking at my stuff, and i really enjoy getting rid of the daily frustrations that could lead to resentments. i do enjoy discovering the damage i have created and amending that damage promptly, so most of that stuff does not end up on my ninth step. most of all, i do enjoy discovering at least thing i am grateful every day. so after a bit of thought, i guess i do enjoy the self-examination that the daily tenth step entails. life is good this morning, now that i am no longer brain dead and well-rested. so off to meet my responsibilities. life does not stop, dang it, and i need to practice a spiritual principle or two.
∞ DT ∞