โ today, my recovery is more than just a fad โ
Posted: Thu, Oct 4, 2007 08:07:13 AM
-- it is a way of life. i am going to practice living my program like my life depend on it, because it does.
yes there are times when recovery and all of its trappings seems dull to me. yes there are times when the whole gig feels like it is just not worth the effort. and yes there are even times when i think i would be better off moving back to my old life. thankfully, today is not one of those times. today i accept that recovery, or more specifically MY RECOVERY just is! yes i have to attend meetings even when i find them dull, in fact when i was growing through a change over the past year, i attended meetings even though i walked out angry every single meeting that i went to. just because i knew that my life depended it. so when i feel the old time to go feeling creeping in, i need to remember what my life was like back in ‘the day.’ and in those days life really did suck, even though i would deny that to the death back then.
so why do i do what i do, even when i do not feel like it? well for one thing i have seen the results in the lives of others when they decide to leave the trappings of recovery along the way side of their journeys. based on their experience, i choose to muddle through PERIOD.
so i am a bit distracted today, and writing this is becoming a second thought instead of my primary one, so i guess it is time to move on and let the day progress as it will.
yes there are times when recovery and all of its trappings seems dull to me. yes there are times when the whole gig feels like it is just not worth the effort. and yes there are even times when i think i would be better off moving back to my old life. thankfully, today is not one of those times. today i accept that recovery, or more specifically MY RECOVERY just is! yes i have to attend meetings even when i find them dull, in fact when i was growing through a change over the past year, i attended meetings even though i walked out angry every single meeting that i went to. just because i knew that my life depended it. so when i feel the old time to go feeling creeping in, i need to remember what my life was like back in ‘the day.’ and in those days life really did suck, even though i would deny that to the death back then.
so why do i do what i do, even when i do not feel like it? well for one thing i have seen the results in the lives of others when they decide to leave the trappings of recovery along the way side of their journeys. based on their experience, i choose to muddle through PERIOD.
so i am a bit distracted today, and writing this is becoming a second thought instead of my primary one, so i guess it is time to move on and let the day progress as it will.
∞ DT ∞