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as i progress spiritually by working the Twelve Steps, i begin to develop new values and standards. as we draw closer to my Higher Power, my values change. as i progress through my 7th STEP i am seeing this more and more. my vision for myself is aligning itself with the person i was always meant to be and part of that person’s make-up is integrity, that is living according to the values that i espouse. is it easy or straight forward, well most of the time it actually is! in fact that path has a whole lot fewer consequences than living contrary to my values. not that are not consequences, part of being true to myself is acknowledging that i know what i know, i know what i feel and i know what i believe. when i act on that knowledge i may cause discomfort to others, especially those who are used to me being quiet or passive. the example in the reading this morning was about cash register honesty, and while a great example, it is not the type on honesty i need to live in the here and now, toady. that sort of honesty is automatic these days, the sort of honesty that i lack from time to time, is standing up for what i know to be true. oh yes, the truth is all relative, but the truth within me, is created by those values that have been instilled in me since the day i made the decision to recover and not just to be abstinent. and that has made quite the difference. so what is up for me today is a whole lot of feelings about being true to myself, my vision for myself, and allowing the will of my concept of a HIGHER POWER to be revealed to me. the amazing part of that last statement is that it can be as automatic as cash register honesty for me, if allow myself to feel what i feel and act accordingly.
so i have bunches of stuff to get done today, and waxing philosophically about the nature of honesty and my true self does nothing to get that stuff done. it is a good day to recover and i will let what i am thinking about percolate through my behaviors and actions through this slice of my life. after all, making some money, getting some stuff done and living in the moemnet is what this is all about.

∞ DT ∞