ω lasting recovery is not found in acceptance from others …
Posted: Mon, Jul 14, 2008 11:05:16 AM
but in the inner growth set in motion by the Twelve Steps. alright then, i am way off my routine today. i took off a day and half over the weekend, then i slept in this morning and then had to run to the banks to take care of my delayed gratification and a bit of service business, and now at 10 AM i am finally getting around to writing my blog.
WHEW, take a breath and relax…
i do not know why this theme has been running around through my head and what i have been getting from the readings over the course of the past few days, i do know, that what i am hearing once again, is that recovery is my responsibility, and whether or not i am accepted by society is irrelevant. of course it would be nice to be accepted by everyone, in all phases of my life, and i have found that being accepted seems to be a side effect of working a program, but side effect or not, it is not my primary concern, most of the time. i have yet to be relieved of this desire, but its importance in the scheme of how i tick these days has been greatly reduced. what is far more important, is how i feel about me. am i doing the best i can to live a program in this minute? am i doing my best to become the person i wish to be? and am i doing my best to do the footwork and let go of the outcome? those questions and many more will probably become part of my daily inventory, when i get back to that step.
so anyhow, instead of feeling guilty and beating myself up for taking part of the weekend off, i think i will congratulate myself for sticking to my guns and allowing myself some down time. and most of all accepting that i am human, and have needs that go way beyond the needs of constant work. that being said, it is time to become socially acceptable and get work done today. my life is all about practicing these principles in my daily affairs and that time has come. it is another good day to be in recovery.
WHEW, take a breath and relax…
i do not know why this theme has been running around through my head and what i have been getting from the readings over the course of the past few days, i do know, that what i am hearing once again, is that recovery is my responsibility, and whether or not i am accepted by society is irrelevant. of course it would be nice to be accepted by everyone, in all phases of my life, and i have found that being accepted seems to be a side effect of working a program, but side effect or not, it is not my primary concern, most of the time. i have yet to be relieved of this desire, but its importance in the scheme of how i tick these days has been greatly reduced. what is far more important, is how i feel about me. am i doing the best i can to live a program in this minute? am i doing my best to become the person i wish to be? and am i doing my best to do the footwork and let go of the outcome? those questions and many more will probably become part of my daily inventory, when i get back to that step.
so anyhow, instead of feeling guilty and beating myself up for taking part of the weekend off, i think i will congratulate myself for sticking to my guns and allowing myself some down time. and most of all accepting that i am human, and have needs that go way beyond the needs of constant work. that being said, it is time to become socially acceptable and get work done today. my life is all about practicing these principles in my daily affairs and that time has come. it is another good day to be in recovery.
∞ DT ∞