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but as the reading goes on to state very clearly it is not recovery, nor is it equivalent to recovery, nor is it a good substitute for recovery. simply put looking acceptable, acting in a socially-acceptable manner, and even participating in accepting social responsibilities, will not keep me clean another day.
so what does that mean to me? an interesting question and one that i ponder at length on many days when i do not want to do the next right thing. after all, if i occupy my mind chasing some elusive phantom through the tangled maze of my mind, i do not have to focus on what is really happening. and what is probably happening is that the quandary in front of me is a choice between practicing spiritual principles or acting in a manner that i believe will boost my image in the eyes of others. quite a jump from social acceptability to people-pleasing and i do not have a clue how i got there.
i guess my point is, that i need to practice a program of recovery on a daily basis, how about on a moment by moment basis, taking the whole constraint of length of time out of the equation. anyhow, if i practice the spiritual principles of the program of recovery as they have been given to me, i get the reward of becoming more socially acceptable, whether i desire that outcome or not! kind of a spooky, ethereal thought, continuing down this whole ghost analogy. so my choice today is to either chase the wraith of social acceptability or follow the concrete and visible program of recovery that the fellowship that gave me this new life has given me. concrete versus spectral -- real versus imagined -- attainable versus elusive. i can measure the progress of my growth in recovery, every moment i get through without causing damage to myself or others is proof that recovery is working in my life. social acceptability is a whole lot trickier to measure, so i think that for this addict, right here , right now, i will move forward into my day working a program of recovery and let social acceptability come as it will or will not. after all, i am truly powerless over what anyone else believes about me!

∞ DT ∞