ΞΌ admit no weakness, conceal all shortcomings, deny every failure, go it alone -- that was the creed i followed ΞΌ
Posted: Wed, Mar 25, 2009 09:51:41 AM
i denied that i was powerless over my addiction, that my life had become unmanageable, despite all evidence to the contrary. the irony of the title line of this blog is, that even today, i find myself falling into that same sort of thinking. despite or possibly because of the fact that i have some days in a row clean. what a lie, clean time != recovery. although i feel less powerless over my addiction these days, and my life looks more manageable, the actual truth is far from what i would like to perceive.
yes, the only reason i am clean, and have been clean for as long as i have, is because i admit, grudgingly at times, that i lack the power to stay clean inherently. with that admission comes the possibility that i can do what it takes to surrender my life into the care of that POWER from which my desire and ability to stay clean comes from.
so i am running a bit behind this morning, it has been a busy day so far, i will close with this thought. i am not alone, i make mistakes, and have shortcomings, and yes i do not know it all. BUT, with that realization comes the HOPE that a POWER GREATER THAN ME can provide for all my needs and keep me clean today. so off to the real world.
yes, the only reason i am clean, and have been clean for as long as i have, is because i admit, grudgingly at times, that i lack the power to stay clean inherently. with that admission comes the possibility that i can do what it takes to surrender my life into the care of that POWER from which my desire and ability to stay clean comes from.
so i am running a bit behind this morning, it has been a busy day so far, i will close with this thought. i am not alone, i make mistakes, and have shortcomings, and yes i do not know it all. BUT, with that realization comes the HOPE that a POWER GREATER THAN ME can provide for all my needs and keep me clean today. so off to the real world.
∞ DT ∞