Blog entry for:
Mon, Aug 16, 2010 11:18:20 AM
¦ the STEPS are my road to spiritual growth ¦
posted: Mon, Aug 16, 2010 11:18:20 AM
this growth is not the result of wishing but of action and prayer. of course i want to join the choir and spout the party line about how much the steps have changed my life and how my experience has been that when i stop working the steps i backslide into unacceptable behaviors and attitudes. yes all of that is true, and yes i totally agree, but what is the point when all i do is parrot what i have taught.
so basically, i could stop right here and right now, as i have nothing new to add to this topic. or i could as i think i will expand on some of my latest growth experiences. it is interesting to me, that over the past few weeks, working has not been what i want to do. i want to be able to do absolutely nothing and still get paid for it, in fact, my attitude has been creeping towards one of entitlement, i am entitled to do nothing and get paid for it. this an obvious symptom of my current spiritual condition, one that is not being furthered by my having to wait for my sponsor to recover from surgery, BUT it is not his fault! much as i would like to, the blame sits squarely on my shoulders, i knew he was going to have surgery and yet i procrastinated until the very last second. so am i stuck well, only i i wish to be, it is true, that my current step work is on hold. i do, however, have recovery work that can be done here and now. what i NEED to do, is to recognize and accept what is happening, and be more diligent in my maintenance step work, namely steps 10, 11, and 12. which means, that i have to stop phoning them in, and focus on making them as relevant to my life today, as when i was formally working them. so just for today, i think i will rededicate myself to those steps and see what happens. i also believe i will add one more meeting to my schedule this week, so it will be off to Boulder this evening to do just that.
and as i was griping about not working, it does be time for me to get back at it. this adventure may be a few hours old already, but that does not mean it is complete by any stretch of the imagination. so it is back to the grind.
so basically, i could stop right here and right now, as i have nothing new to add to this topic. or i could as i think i will expand on some of my latest growth experiences. it is interesting to me, that over the past few weeks, working has not been what i want to do. i want to be able to do absolutely nothing and still get paid for it, in fact, my attitude has been creeping towards one of entitlement, i am entitled to do nothing and get paid for it. this an obvious symptom of my current spiritual condition, one that is not being furthered by my having to wait for my sponsor to recover from surgery, BUT it is not his fault! much as i would like to, the blame sits squarely on my shoulders, i knew he was going to have surgery and yet i procrastinated until the very last second. so am i stuck well, only i i wish to be, it is true, that my current step work is on hold. i do, however, have recovery work that can be done here and now. what i NEED to do, is to recognize and accept what is happening, and be more diligent in my maintenance step work, namely steps 10, 11, and 12. which means, that i have to stop phoning them in, and focus on making them as relevant to my life today, as when i was formally working them. so just for today, i think i will rededicate myself to those steps and see what happens. i also believe i will add one more meeting to my schedule this week, so it will be off to Boulder this evening to do just that.
and as i was griping about not working, it does be time for me to get back at it. this adventure may be a few hours old already, but that does not mean it is complete by any stretch of the imagination. so it is back to the grind.
∞ DT ∞
The views expressed on this page are solely the opinion of the author.
While the author is a member of a 12 Step recovery fellowship, these writings are not intended to endorse or express the published wisdom of any fellowship.
These writings are not meant to be socially or politically correct, and if you take issue with any opinions expressed, please seek the guidance of someone wiser than me.
While the author is a member of a 12 Step recovery fellowship, these writings are not intended to endorse or express the published wisdom of any fellowship.
These writings are not meant to be socially or politically correct, and if you take issue with any opinions expressed, please seek the guidance of someone wiser than me.
Another Look!
up or down 283 words ➥ Monday, August 16, 2004 by: donnot∞ uphill journey ∞ 379 words ➥ Tuesday, August 16, 2005 by: donnot
↔ up or down -- it is one or the other, with very little in between, where spiritual growth is concerned. ↔ 351 words ➥ Wednesday, August 16, 2006 by: donnot
∞ my spiritual condition is never static; if it is not growing, ∞ 458 words ➥ Thursday, August 16, 2007 by: donnot
∞ my only option is to actively participate in my program of spiritual growth. ∞ 534 words ➥ Saturday, August 16, 2008 by: donnot
Λ if i stand still, my spiritual progress will lose its upward momentum Λ 544 words ➥ Sunday, August 16, 2009 by: donnot
⇓ this is my road to spiritual growth. i change every day ⇑ 555 words ➥ Tuesday, August 16, 2011 by: donnot
∂ the only constant in my spiritual condition is change ∂ 707 words ➥ Thursday, August 16, 2012 by: donnot
β i cannot rely on the program i worked yesterday β 557 words ➥ Friday, August 16, 2013 by: donnot
℘ my spiritual growth is not the result of ℘ 545 words ➥ Saturday, August 16, 2014 by: donnot
⇓ up or down ⇑ 465 words ➥ Sunday, August 16, 2015 by: donnot
✫ not the result ✬ 517 words ➥ Tuesday, August 16, 2016 by: donnot
🏔 back to where 🏜 487 words ➥ Wednesday, August 16, 2017 by: donnot
🌄 not fueled 🌅 493 words ➥ Thursday, August 16, 2018 by: donnot
👍 wishing 👎 533 words ➥ Friday, August 16, 2019 by: donnot
👍 my spiritual condition 👎 440 words ➥ Sunday, August 16, 2020 by: donnot
🖖 is it 🙋 549 words ➥ Monday, August 16, 2021 by: donnot
🧞 my recovery 🧚 324 words ➥ Tuesday, August 16, 2022 by: donnot
🤝 a commitment 🤝 550 words ➥ Wednesday, August 16, 2023 by: donnot
😞 wishing and dreaming, 😞 312 words ➥ Friday, August 16, 2024 by: donnot
☯ The Tao that can be spoken is not the eternal Tao ☯
by Lao-Tse
Translated by James Legge
Book 1
3) And when (one with the highest excellence) does not wrangle (about
his low position), no one finds fault with him.