Blog entry for:
Fri, Feb 3, 2012 12:23:00 PM
‡ i must open my mind to experience that works, no matter where it comes from ‡
posted: Fri, Feb 3, 2012 12:23:00 PM
IF i hope to continue to grow in my recovery.
well it is a day off for me, due to mechanical problems with my faithful car, and not because of the snow. as much as i wanted and perhaps needed a day off, i WOULD have gone to work this morning, IF my car could have got me to the bus stop. i do accept the gift, even though it is costing me some bucks, but i also procrastinated in getting something checked out and as a result, who knows what the consequence will end up being.
what, if anything does this have to opening my mind to new sources of information? well…
… i am not quite sure, i DO KNOW that the longer i stay clean the less certain i am about what i DO KNOW and the more certain i am that i NEED to learn from sources i once dismissed and disregarded. i can of course, pay lip service to this concept and go blithely on in an obtuse sort of manner, thinking that there is nothing else for me to learn. i DO SO at the peril of my life and well-being. i do march to the party line in this instance, it is our difference in experience that provide different insights into how this recovery gig works. as i grow into accepting step 11 more and more, i have come to realize that the POWER that fuels my recovery speaks to me through sources that i may not think are appropriate or even relevant. the newest newcomer or the frequent relapser, may be the one source that i need to hear, and if i stop welcoming them to the fellowship that is my home, I LOSE.
so there is certainly a self-serving motive behind this particular spiritual principle, i GET to stay clean by listening to differing points of view. i GET to grow by being open-minded and i GET to have this life only if i follow the suggestions. well the bad news is that no matter how well i took care of my car, something that was not due to be changed for another 25000 miles went out and the damage may mean a whole lot more than i want to pay. that will be something that has yet to be determined as well. i can move on and allow myself the freedom to be pissed off, for a minute than go get a car so i am mobile. life does have a few bumps in my road today.
well it is a day off for me, due to mechanical problems with my faithful car, and not because of the snow. as much as i wanted and perhaps needed a day off, i WOULD have gone to work this morning, IF my car could have got me to the bus stop. i do accept the gift, even though it is costing me some bucks, but i also procrastinated in getting something checked out and as a result, who knows what the consequence will end up being.
what, if anything does this have to opening my mind to new sources of information? well…
… i am not quite sure, i DO KNOW that the longer i stay clean the less certain i am about what i DO KNOW and the more certain i am that i NEED to learn from sources i once dismissed and disregarded. i can of course, pay lip service to this concept and go blithely on in an obtuse sort of manner, thinking that there is nothing else for me to learn. i DO SO at the peril of my life and well-being. i do march to the party line in this instance, it is our difference in experience that provide different insights into how this recovery gig works. as i grow into accepting step 11 more and more, i have come to realize that the POWER that fuels my recovery speaks to me through sources that i may not think are appropriate or even relevant. the newest newcomer or the frequent relapser, may be the one source that i need to hear, and if i stop welcoming them to the fellowship that is my home, I LOSE.
so there is certainly a self-serving motive behind this particular spiritual principle, i GET to stay clean by listening to differing points of view. i GET to grow by being open-minded and i GET to have this life only if i follow the suggestions. well the bad news is that no matter how well i took care of my car, something that was not due to be changed for another 25000 miles went out and the damage may mean a whole lot more than i want to pay. that will be something that has yet to be determined as well. i can move on and allow myself the freedom to be pissed off, for a minute than go get a car so i am mobile. life does have a few bumps in my road today.
∞ DT ∞
The views expressed on this page are solely the opinion of the author.
While the author is a member of a 12 Step recovery fellowship, these writings are not intended to endorse or express the published wisdom of any fellowship.
These writings are not meant to be socially or politically correct, and if you take issue with any opinions expressed, please seek the guidance of someone wiser than me.
While the author is a member of a 12 Step recovery fellowship, these writings are not intended to endorse or express the published wisdom of any fellowship.
These writings are not meant to be socially or politically correct, and if you take issue with any opinions expressed, please seek the guidance of someone wiser than me.
Another Look!
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☯ The Tao that can be spoken is not the eternal Tao ☯
by Lao-Tse
Translated by James Legge
Book 2
2) This honouring of the Tao and exalting of its operation is not
the result of any ordination, but always a spontaneous tribute.