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well i overslept today and as a result i am more than i bit off. this is just a continuation of the pattern of thinking i was in last night -- not being able to put a train of thought together, and shooting off on a thousand different tangents at once. so here i am off on yet another tangent instead of commenting on my take on the reading...
anyhow, what the reading said to me this morning that no matter how hard i push, i cannot bring anyone into recovery, nor can i force them to recover once they are here. this idea for me is so foreign and unacceptable that for many years i just disregarded it. today i am beginning to see the wisdom in it. if i consume my resources in trying to work someone else‘s program, i am unable to provide the needed energy to work mine. if i spend myself trying to get those i love to accept our way of life, i lose the energy i need to live the program that has given me everything i have always wanted and never admitted i needed -- self-esteem, self-acceptance, and self-forgiveness. honestly and sincerely surrendering my loved ones to the care of a HIGHER POWER, letting them make their own mistakes, and finding their own way of recovering is the most loving and gentle thing i can do today for them and me. so for today anyway i will express my love for those around me and myself by detaching my program from everyone else‘s.
∞ DT ∞