Blog entry for:

i have a place to live, food in the refrigerator, a job, my car is running...
quite a lot of conditions when trying to see if i am happy or not! when i think about it, all of those conditions, as the reading continues on to say, are external factors, and that like it or not, happiness is an inside job.more and more i get that, even if in those early days i though more money, more friends, or more things would MAKE me happy.
yes, just as i did when i used, i sought happiness from the outside. i bought the message that society and culture was selling me, that bigger and badder was better and better would always make me happier. as a result, most of my recovery has been deprogramming myself through better behavior, the “behaving my way to better thinking,” path. i have discovered that i may not be able to buy my happiness any more, and even if i could, it would be just like getting high, i would feel as if everything in my world was GREAT, in that instant, but that feeling would quickly fade and i would need to fix again, to regain that feeling, REAL happiness i am discovering comes from within me. have i done all that i could do today, to foster my journey on the path to becoming the sort of person i have always wanted to be? is a more apt question than is my car running.
well, this is strange and unusual, i have run out of things and ideas to write about before i have run out of time. i guess i will just leave all of you with this thought, just for today, i will seek happiness from within, the peace and sense of contentment i get, can cvome from being the best i can be today.

∞ DT ∞