Blog entry for:

okay, right off the bat, my view of the spiritual side of life does not include a whole lot of prayer. i put it a bit more succinctly when i say i am not a prayerful guy, but that is not how it always has been. i am not going into the history of prayer according to Don today, as i am more than certain that iu have done that more than once in the past. i will provide this thumbnail however: fox hole ⇒ please and thank you ⇒ Santa God ⇒ seeking knowledge of God's will ⇒ please and thank you for keeping me clean. as one my peers is fond of saying “my HIGHER POWER, has no ears.”
as i move towards the end of the assignment i need to complete my 11TH STEP, i see how important this aspect of the relationship i have with the POWER that fuels my recovery becomes. as i grow more comfortable with my vision from the East, i start to feel the presence of the POWER that fuels my recovery, most of the time. it is that feeling, that sustains me and allows me the freedom to pause and listen to what is in my heart, instead of what is in my head. if one chooses to, one could call such a pause prayer, but there is no “i beseech thee,” component to that action at all. it is merely a STOP ⇒ GET QUIET ⇒ FEEL ⇒ MOVE ON, kind of thing, and i am starting to understand, finally, when my sponse keeps saying i need to feel the solution, not think it up.
with all that being said, how do i reconcile my view with that of the fellowship that has given me this new manner of living, including the freedom to move beyond what i was culturally and socially taught the spiritual world looks like. for one, i am not advocating this path for anyone else, as i am uncertain that it would work for them. more importantly, i do pray at least twice a day and ask a HIGHER POWER to give me the power to stay clean and see the next right thing to do. so it is not as if i am totally out of the ballpark here, just way way out in left field. i have in in the recovery process, as well as in my peers, friends and associates, and have moved into a place that allows me to see that they, too, have to come to some sort of path themselves, as well. being a member of the “No Matter What” club, allows me the freedom to show them my path, share my experience with them and more importunately let them stumble along to the trail-head of their spiritual path.
anyhow, it is time to get moving down the road and off into the real world. i take that next step with the FAITH, that if i allow it, i will feel my way to the next right thing, and get everything i need spiritually today to thrive. it is a good day to be walking a path towards the light.

∞ DT ∞