Blog entry for:

keeps me clean, fuels my recovery and provides me the opportunity to get everything i need, is my current concept of GOD as i understand GOD. here is where i would recount my various misadventures and misunderstandings that i traveled through to arrive at this place. today, however i am not in to reminiscing about the painful, twisted journey that brought me here. today, i am comfortable just being okay with what is. today, i have to accept that whatever it took, it was just what i needed to go through to arrive at a place where i can comfortably ask that POWER, for the power to stay clean , just for today.

Carlos G.
Thirty-nine (39) years clean.
Congrats my friend and sponsor.

the whole “GOD” thing is no longer an issue for me, so what [popped off the stack was not some sort of spiritual revelation this morning. what i did hear was that i had to accept the inevitable consequence of aging and mortality, for myself and for those i love. when i consider the manner in which my Dad died last year, i can see that he fought for every minute, until he had no “fight” left. i am hoping that is how i face those final days and with the help of the POWER that fuels my recovery, i will continue to do what i need to do, to get to that place. what i also “heard” is that the will to live better is something that is personally relevant. perhaps, i have been too judgemental on those who chose to do a very long fade to black instead of doing what they can to live in the here and now. i have to accept that living each minute to its fullest. these days my life is very full and these days i am doing my best to honor and acknowledge the source of my will to have a better life, the POWER that fuels my recovery. so it is time to post this little ditty and get ready to head on down to Denver, to participate in living the life i choose to live.

∞ DT ∞