Blog entry for:

i need to face life on its own terms seems to come when i need it and am paying attention to the opportunities that i am presented with by the POWER that fuels my recovery. as i finish up what i wanted to accomplish today, i am a bit disappointed that i could not take my online assessment last evening as i had planned to do. not being able to do so, gave me a bit of relief and allowed me to sleep soundly for the first time in a week. my plans being thwarted i caught up on all the episodes that have dropped for one of the many shows i have been obsessed with over the course of the past few years. as i sat this morning, i realized that what did not lack was courage, just the opportunity to “show my stuff.” i can get past that, and if the opportunity comes around again, i will not dilly-dally out of fear.
it is true that as i sat this morning, i had trouble letting go and quieting the internal conversation. that voice was, for a change, not self-deprecating, for a change. when i finally shut-down, what i heard, other than my plans not being fulfilled last night, was a sense of knowing that no matter what, i am in the correct place, spiritually, physically and emotionally. my plans today, have all come to fruition and win or lose at Fantasy Football this afternoon, i am okay. time for me to pack this in and get out and about. yes, i will stay clean no matter what, as i know that is certainly the will of the POWER that fuels my recovery for me today. what else may happen? well that will be revealed as the day goes on and i will allow myself to be okay, not having a clue.

∞ DT ∞