Blog entry for:

of discipline is not some sort of kinky life style choice or cosplay for me. it is, as the reading suggests the application of my willingness by taking concrete, measurable and repeatable action based on my DESIRE to live a program of active recovery. on this day, the start of my sixty-seventh trip around Sol, i feel grateful that the discipline i have learned too practice is paying off, even though, at times i wonder if it is worth it. the fitness program i started a few years ago has led to me running a 10K today in 58 minutes and 44 seconds, almost as good as i ran last year in the Bolder Boulder road race. certainly not a bad measure of my fitness, but not the only one. in my head, however, that is more than adequate to continue down the path i have chosen, but physical fitness is not the only payoff i get from practicing discipline.
today, i have found a balance in my life, emotionally and mentally. i may still get pissed off and the middle finger salute may feel as if it is appropriate reaction to a driver that fails to respect my right of way as a pedestrian, but it happens less and less and the event has to be quite egregious for me to choose to “flip them off.” spending twenty minutes in quite meditation every morning gives me a head start on dealing with those around me, even when those around me are not dealing well with what they are given. seeking the opportunities to get what i need rather than cratering to my desires, allows me to be grateful for this life and a program of recovery that has brought me this far. i could go on and on, but i am quite certain that my point has been made.
for me, placing the routine of my recovery program before my life, is certainly the way to a better person and the HOPE i have of another day clean has certainly transformed into a deep and abiding FAITH that for the first time in my life, i am finally on the correct track. i could live in the remorse of what i did not do or the FEAR of an uncharted future as i age, but to what end. today, i choose to live a life based on spiritual principles and being worth doing whatever it takes to put those principles into action, no matter what. it is, after all, a good day to be clean, on this side of the lawn and to seek a spiritual way that leads to greater contentment and yes even joy.

∞ DT ∞