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always striving to be better at practicing integrity., one of my pet peeves about the source of this little exercise this morning, is when the authors make a very clumsy attempt to tie something that is certainly a spiritual principle to service, when they could just speak to personal recovery, as they did three-fourths of the way through the entry. i understand the intent of this particular piece of literature, to balance personal recovery with service to the fellowship and the world around me. this morning however, it struck me as ham-fisted and more than a bit overbearing. the notion that integrity in service is ties directly to how well i practice integrity in my personal life, is a no-brainer. instead of going down the path of being a “hater,” i will let myself wax semi-poetically about how when i practice integrity in my personal life, it spills over to my service efforts to my fellowship and the world around me.
there is a saying in our fellowship that goes something like if i want to change i have to act my way into better thinking. as i learn how to live up to what i agree to do, which is to practice these spiritual principles in all my affairs, i find myself caught in the throes of desire, self-interest and entitlement, less often. it is ironic that i am waiting for the scam to drop on Twitter, knowing full well that no one is going to give me fifty grand. oh sure, i would dig the shit out of such a windfall, but i am no longer as naive or gullible as i once was, when it comes to getting something for nothing on the internet. as i live what i believe, i do not become smarter, but sometimes, in a tightly constrained circumstance, i have become a bit wiser. when i show up for my fellow human beings and am present, i demonstrate that i am no longer the flake i was, way back when. even when i do not want to serve, i do my bit, a bit grudgingly, but i show up nevertheless. this morning, parsing through what i read, what i heard and what i thought about the source material, i can see i have a bit more work to do in regards tom practicing these principles in all my affairs.
i have opinions and i have thoughts. i am so glad that the fellowship that i landed in, encourages me to ask how and why. i may not spout the party line in all the things i share, but i know for certain that living as i do, today, is better than i have ever lived before in my life. part of that is due to my consideration of whether or not the thing i am about to do, is truly the next right thing to do. i get that question correct most of the time these days, and that is because i have had more than enough role models about how to live a life in active recovery, just for today.

∞ DT ∞