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and the freedom of choice responsibility implies. i do not take recovery for granted.
i was just speaking to a newcomer last night about the three disturbing realizations, and BOOM up pops this reading about being responsible for my recovery. accepting that if i want to continue to receive the gifts that have been given to me as a result of my trip down recovery lane, then it is necessary to do what i need to do to maintain my recovery. WHEW quite a mouthful there and quite a headful also. the implications of that statement used to be totally lost on me. for the longest time i believed that all i had to do to recover is remain abstinent. being abstinent is a start but just being abstinent from the use of mind-altering substances will kill this addict. i need a manner of living which provides me the internal structure i need to survive my feelings, my plans, my ideas and what i believe is the truth. i have more than enough evidence that i am an addict and that what i see and feel is filtered through the part of me i call my disease. and what comes out the other side of that filter is mostly wrong. you may be wondering where this little digression about the disease as it affects me is heading, well quite simply that little piece of knowledge is sufficient to create a desire within me to do whatever i need to do today to continue the recovery process. that process regrinds the filter of my disease and allows me to glimpse at what is really going on inside of me and sometimes even get a clue as to what is occurring in the world around me. so today as it is every day, the only person responsible for my recovery is me, and that is task enough for today!

∞ DT ∞