Blog entry for:

when i lose self-will as difficult as that may seem at times. as i sit here much later than usual, i have had quite the day. i watched football, worked out, did some work and now am looking forward to a nap and some yard work. i still have a meeting and step work to go over with a sponsee, and who know what else may be tossed my way as the day finishes out. it may seem a little ironic to be writing about self-will this far into my day, however for me, it is something i NEED to be present for. yes i make the decision, every morning to let go of my will and surrender into the care of that POWER that provides for all my needs, and yet as the day goes on i more often than not, find myself slipping back into that will. a reminder more than half way through my day is not a bad idea.
although i try my best to dismiss superstition, i find myself wondering about my football team, the two time i wore my ancient piece of football gear, is the two games they won. the oh so human addict part of me, wants to take credit for that,m after all, there is evidence that the only win this season when i wear that piece of clothing, so washing it is out of the question as is retiring it to the rag bag, which is certainly where it will soon be destined to go. this example of self-will may seem a bit of hyperbole, but it is illustrative of how i believe that i can achieve power in my life, and what i can take back from the care of my HIGHER POWER.
as i sit here, at a loss for words, i think i will just say, that for the rest of today, to the best of my ability, i will allow my entire will and life to be surrendered into the care of the POWER that keeps me clean. we will see how that goes, so off to the yard i go.

∞ DT ∞