Blog entry for:

others get to know me, they would reject me. as i write this, in the middle of the afternoon, as the snow starts to fall, i am really postponing what i NEED to do, this afternoon, with something that i WANT to do. the meeting of my home group certainly gave me food for thought, and yes i had to tell on myself as well. all is good, as the demons of the addict thoughts that come and go, have once again been exorcised. that is an excellent thing and maybe, just maybe i can get the demon that i have created in my professional life to be removed as well. ironically, being stabbed in the back, by someone who appears to be one of the other 85%, is starting to fade from my obsessive self-centered addict brain and become part of the constant white noise that often threatens to overwhelm me, and certainly does consume far more of my personal power, than i am willing to give.
to get off this particular tangent and on topic, may take a rather clumsy segue, however it does fit in the theme that has been my day today. accepting myself, as i am, is the core of the spiritual principle that is humility, at least as it is defined in the fellowship that is my recovery home. coming to the realization that accepting myself, was necessary for my survival in recovery is quite a jump, because only IF i accept myself, will i be able to accept others as they are.
so work beckons, and as nice as this distraction is, it too is being interrupted by other stuff, so better to that instead of chasing all the squirrels that happen to be running around this afternoon. it is a good day to be clean and part of something more, on a path do being something more, one day at a time.

∞ DT ∞