« i am accepted in this fellowship and i do fit in »
Posted: Thu, Feb 9, 2012 06:57:14 AM
today, it is safe to start letting others into my life.
it certainly has been an interesting set of days in a row, over the past week, and sitting here in no particular hurry this morning, i have a minute or two to reflect over what i NEED to talk about with my sponse this evening. not that i am willing to share all of that with you guys, but there are certainly more than a few broad themes that have been playing over and over again in my life, like incessant elevator music, that is always there but at the edge of my perception.
on the top of that stack is staking my self-acceptance on the behavior of others. i thought i had grown out of that, and yet once again, i discover that i am entangled quite severely in it. the roll on the floor laughing my a$$ off irony here? it was pointed out to me, by the one sponsee, who is driven the strongly by his need to seek self-esteem through the eyes of others.
man o man, what a life.
anyhow, i forgot all the pithy and insightful things i was going to write, so i guess i will just jump in the shower and get moving forward, who knows after a drive to Denver and a little work, the muse may once again be upon me.
it certainly has been an interesting set of days in a row, over the past week, and sitting here in no particular hurry this morning, i have a minute or two to reflect over what i NEED to talk about with my sponse this evening. not that i am willing to share all of that with you guys, but there are certainly more than a few broad themes that have been playing over and over again in my life, like incessant elevator music, that is always there but at the edge of my perception.
on the top of that stack is staking my self-acceptance on the behavior of others. i thought i had grown out of that, and yet once again, i discover that i am entangled quite severely in it. the roll on the floor laughing my a$$ off irony here? it was pointed out to me, by the one sponsee, who is driven the strongly by his need to seek self-esteem through the eyes of others.
man o man, what a life.
anyhow, i forgot all the pithy and insightful things i was going to write, so i guess i will just jump in the shower and get moving forward, who knows after a drive to Denver and a little work, the muse may once again be upon me.
∞ DT ∞