I have been clean for:
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ยฑ sharing with others about my feelings may ยฑ

Posted: Sat, Dec 28, 2013 08:18:37 AM

let me know i am not the only person who has been depressed in recovery. so the sun is coming back, the holiday season is nearly over and as predicted, that darkness of spirit i felt is starting to lift. practically right on schedule, as it were. well, a little bit ahead, as the acupuncture and message session i had a few weeks ago, started to part the clouds. so my conditio0n as temporary as it is, is nothing compared to the suffering i see in some of my peers. i know that they may have real mental illnesses, but something that disturbs me about that, is that they use that to define themselves, and put limits on far they can go in their recovery. the last thing i want is to be defined by a collection of diseases, disorders and behaviors. while all of those are part of me, and make up who i am, they are NOT who i am. i am more than the sum of my less than desirable parts. that is the case now, and if i continue my journey towards becoming the man i want to be, that will continue to be the case, in the future.
i know how easy it is to define myself as the sum of emotional and mental disorders, after all, i identify myself as an addict. i am more than just an addict though, i am an addict in recovery, who is doing his best to live a spiritual program, even when he does not feel like it. that includes living my life like i always do, even though i do not feel like it.
speaking of that, i need to get running and get some stuff done before my hoem group this morning. it is a good day to be clean and even a better day to accept that just for today, no matter how much i feel like it, i can live my life to the fullest!

∞ DT ∞


Another Look

This day in older entries

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๐Ÿ˜ grace in my ๐Ÿ˜Ž
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545 words ➥ Friday, December 28, 2012 by donnot
ยฟ i accept that my feelings will NOT last forever ยฟ
459 words ➥ Wednesday, December 28, 2011 by donnot
ฯ– i cannot afford to let depression lead me back to using ฯ–
455 words ➥ Monday, December 28, 2009 by donnot
โˆž this too shall pass โˆž
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โ†” depression โ†”
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Tao Te Ching

☯ The Tao that can be spoken is not the eternal Tao ☯

The Tao Teh King, or The Tao and Its Characteristics
by Lao-Tse
Translated by James Legge

Book 2

2) It is the way of Heaven not to strive, and yet it skilfully overcomes;
not to speak, and yet it is skilful in (obtaining a reply; does not
call, and yet men come to it of themselves. Its demonstrations are
quiet, and yet its plans are skilful and effective. The meshes of
the net of Heaven are large; far apart, but letting nothing escape.