FEAR vs FAITH
Posted: Mon, Jul 12, 2004 05:26:02 AM
i want all the gifts of recovery and i want them now
what a thought! here i am still feeling that way today.
i want it all and yet i am unwilling to make the sacrifices necessary to get them.
do i really desire living in a place of FAITH in myself, the program and a loving, caring Higher Power?
after some contemplation, i realize that my program has been based on FEAR. the fear of what would happen if i used, the fear of the humiliation of coming back after using and the fear of the pain of getting clean. although FEAR has kept me clean and allowed me to grow, i now realize that it has also limited what gifts i am capable of receiving and how far i can go on the journey of becoming the person i want to be.
the time has come to make a decsion to let go of my FEAR and reaffirm the 3rd Step decision to turn my all of my life and will over including my FEAR and learn to walk in FAITH.
i am worthy of getting more, but i still self-sabotage my life and my recovery by basing decisions on the FEAR of what if
well what if monkeys fly out of my a$$?
just for today, i will start to learn how to live in FAITH!
what a thought! here i am still feeling that way today.
i want it all and yet i am unwilling to make the sacrifices necessary to get them.
do i really desire living in a place of FAITH in myself, the program and a loving, caring Higher Power?
after some contemplation, i realize that my program has been based on FEAR. the fear of what would happen if i used, the fear of the humiliation of coming back after using and the fear of the pain of getting clean. although FEAR has kept me clean and allowed me to grow, i now realize that it has also limited what gifts i am capable of receiving and how far i can go on the journey of becoming the person i want to be.
the time has come to make a decsion to let go of my FEAR and reaffirm the 3rd Step decision to turn my all of my life and will over including my FEAR and learn to walk in FAITH.
i am worthy of getting more, but i still self-sabotage my life and my recovery by basing decisions on the FEAR of what if
well what if monkeys fly out of my a$$?
just for today, i will start to learn how to live in FAITH!
-- DT --