✍ the full range โ
Posted: Fri, Dec 16, 2016 05:38:04 AM
of my recovery. Surprise, posting at oh so dark thirty, I am not used to being up and awake for twenty -four hours and I still have a few more. Well I exaggerate, I actually got a bit of sleep on the flight from Denver. there are all sorts of notions running through my brain, as I compose my last piece before going off the grid. I want it to be pithy, edgy and a blog to remember and yet as I sit here at the bar finishing my eggs, listening to the East Coast attitude spill out over the whole area.
As I think about where I have been and where I am going, figutaively and literally, there is one theme that seems to keep playing out. Just as shark, in theory, needs to keep moving to live, so I have discovered in my recovery process. When I stop, I start to die, bit by bit. the “smoke” of complacency quickly overtakes me and the body at rest part of inertia seems to rule the day. When I stop, it is hard to get started again, so the easier, softer way for this addict is just to keep moving on.
I do need to comment on my friend Brian, as I may not get the chance to gather with those who knew and celebrate his life. Yes, that is the literal part of moving forward., as in space. Currently I am sea level in Miami and in a few mor hours I will be off the grid sailing the Windward Islands. Brian and my vacations, never seemed to mesh very well, but today, as I am sitting and waiting, and waiting, and waiting, for my next flight, I feel an emptiness that can no longer be filled. I miss his accurately insightful look at the world and wonder what if anything I can do, to honor him, now that he is gone. I am not a broken up, emotionally over his death today, but I still feel the pain, which I can see as a good thing.
Just as I am up for twenty four hours, it will be another 8 days before I get to a meeting. Honestly I am not used to ten to twelve day streches. What that means is I need to be diligent about the rest of my daily program, stepping up my practice of these principles in all of my affairs. It also means that even when I have not been totally shut-down since 5 AM yesterday, I still need to bracket my day with STEPS 10 and 11, which I think I will take care of right now.
As I think about where I have been and where I am going, figutaively and literally, there is one theme that seems to keep playing out. Just as shark, in theory, needs to keep moving to live, so I have discovered in my recovery process. When I stop, I start to die, bit by bit. the “smoke” of complacency quickly overtakes me and the body at rest part of inertia seems to rule the day. When I stop, it is hard to get started again, so the easier, softer way for this addict is just to keep moving on.
I do need to comment on my friend Brian, as I may not get the chance to gather with those who knew and celebrate his life. Yes, that is the literal part of moving forward., as in space. Currently I am sea level in Miami and in a few mor hours I will be off the grid sailing the Windward Islands. Brian and my vacations, never seemed to mesh very well, but today, as I am sitting and waiting, and waiting, and waiting, for my next flight, I feel an emptiness that can no longer be filled. I miss his accurately insightful look at the world and wonder what if anything I can do, to honor him, now that he is gone. I am not a broken up, emotionally over his death today, but I still feel the pain, which I can see as a good thing.
Just as I am up for twenty four hours, it will be another 8 days before I get to a meeting. Honestly I am not used to ten to twelve day streches. What that means is I need to be diligent about the rest of my daily program, stepping up my practice of these principles in all of my affairs. It also means that even when I have not been totally shut-down since 5 AM yesterday, I still need to bracket my day with STEPS 10 and 11, which I think I will take care of right now.
∞ DT ∞