Blog entry for:

to be among the fortunate ones, who have found recovery. was my arrival in this group **lucky** or the work of a divine **invisible hand,** is what this reading brings up for me, this morning. there just may be a rhyme and rhythm to the universe and the chain of events that drove me to the rooms of recovery and spared me along that way, may have been part of that grand scheme. i have more than a bit of a hard time with that notion, as why would i have been CHOSEN to GET recovery, when millions are not so “lucky.” for me, accepting that GOD sent me here, suggests that GOD is capricious and fickle, at least when i apply a bit of rational reasoning to that process. that is part of the reason i have walked away from that particular spiritual path, as i find it difficult to explain many of the contradictions i see and of course that old reliable stand-by of: “no one can know the mind of GOD,” no longer flies, either. so here i sit somewhere between divine will and luck.
these days the POWER that fuels my recovery, is where i go and that POWER, whatever its nature, allows me the opportunities to get i need to stay clean today. many times in my recovery, after i was forced to get clean and grudgingly accepted that a recovery process was something i needed, have i been given the opportunity to use, when no one was looking. more than once across the course of my life, even in the past ten days, have i been presented with the opportunity to do the “next wrong thing,” and be totally justified in doing so. the “miracle” for me anyhow, is that i have been given a gift and that gift is the opportunity to recover today. today, i need not be owned by addiction and i do not need to be an a$$hole, because i did not get what i thought i needed. today i can be better than yesterday and hustle up and get to work, so i can fix the issues i already know exist. it is a good day to be clean and yes,that may be a miracle and i can live with that today.

∞ DT ∞