Blog entry for:

possibilities, that a life in recovery can offer me. got to own up to the fact that i hijacked this reading to go in a different direction this morning. i do believe that there is a POWER greater than my addiction and i happen to call IT, the POWER that fuels my recovery. as that POWER lacks any real definition in my mind, i can call IT GOD, so my peers and fellows travelers along this path can relate to how that POWER works in my life. the coolest part of all of that, is i stay clean and no longer have to fit that POWER into a the mold i think was cast by my peers. they have the same freedom that i do and now that i am free, i will defend to the death for them to uncover their own path to finding a HIGHER POWER that works for them.
quite honestly, i woke up on “wrong side of the bed” this morning. i uncovered i was still fuming about how i was treated at a corporate coffee chain yesterday and have decided that i can take my bidness elsewhere, and will. the locally owned coffee shops are struggling in these times of “social isolation,” those that remain open that is, so i will vote with my dollar bills and sample some other places. as i sat, i wondered if i really needed to carry the weight of what happened yesterday with me through this day as well. it came to me, that i had already decided to physically move on and all that was left to do was drop my spiritual and emotional weight. as i was moving the wonderful frozen bundles of joy from my sidewalk this morning, i saw that i could move on, as i had already downloaded the convenient app that would allow me to minimize my contact with the employees at a local coffee shop and forget i ever had my itsy, bitsy feelings hurt, after all, i already had decided to move my money elsewhere.
i am finding “hunkering down” is not a good look for me. the notion that i “need” social contact is so freaking ironic that i cracked myself up, just considering it. up until last week, i believed that i was a “home body” and could weather this storm without any ill effects. this first class isolater, hates being isolated. even though i have people in my home, i still crave outside interaction and pop out to do this or do that whenever the whim strikes me. in fact, my plan of today is to do just that. pop-out to try out my new go to coffee shop and see how things work for me. i know that somewhere in this whirlwind of pandemic responses, i will find a balance, between being a home body and being out and about as i am allowed to be. the silver lining is that as the weather gets nicer, i can extend my workouts as outside in the fresh air, as is my preference. everything else, will be as it will be and i need to let go and allow myself the freedom to adapt.

∞ DT ∞