๐ก recognizing that i ๐ก
Posted: Tue, Jan 20, 2026 10:28:17 AM
am human and worthy of love and acknowledgment, did not come from inside of me, way back when. i had to be told, over and over and over again by my peers that i was worthy of having love and acknowledgement. living in the real world and playing around with something different with AI, i am struck by how literal what i say and write can be taken. i moved on from images and am trying my hand at AI assisted creative writing. the story i am writing goes with a set of images i created a month or so ago and i am finding that imposing my will on the inanimate actually feels as if i have some power. the triumph of my human will over an obstinate, monolithic Large Language Model, is certainly a bit fun and it has me going in a different direction. our first chapter is nearing completion and i am going to have to download it and actually add my own take to what we have created,as right now it reads a bit stiff and artificial.
my plan of the day has been changed, due to illness and instead of getting to pound out my creative writing project, i agreed to work, after my oil change, i guess that is the price i pay for living in town and being retired. it seems that when an emergency comes up at work, they text me to cover. i could get all sorts of bent about that, but i reality, i really had no major things to do today. a few extra bucks on my next paycheck is not a bad payoff either. what i am getting instead is a bit of resignation that i can pick up the shift, i have the desire to help out and it is costing me very little. what they get, i cannot say, but they are coming to depend upon me and that may not be a bad thing, as i am mostly dependable these days.
where does that all line up with sharing my humanity and being worth love and acknowledgement? i am not sure, but what i can say that in the void this morning, there was very little chaos, confusion or idle thoughts drifting up from the quiet. what i got was the feeling that as a human being, i have the ability to be open about what i feel. i can continue to practice my social skills, which do seem to be coming right along and i can be creative with the help of a bit of artificial intelligence. i am worth being relied upon and trusted today, because i have developed a sense of self that includes more that getting the next fix or hit of dopamine, just for today.
my plan of the day has been changed, due to illness and instead of getting to pound out my creative writing project, i agreed to work, after my oil change, i guess that is the price i pay for living in town and being retired. it seems that when an emergency comes up at work, they text me to cover. i could get all sorts of bent about that, but i reality, i really had no major things to do today. a few extra bucks on my next paycheck is not a bad payoff either. what i am getting instead is a bit of resignation that i can pick up the shift, i have the desire to help out and it is costing me very little. what they get, i cannot say, but they are coming to depend upon me and that may not be a bad thing, as i am mostly dependable these days.
where does that all line up with sharing my humanity and being worth love and acknowledgement? i am not sure, but what i can say that in the void this morning, there was very little chaos, confusion or idle thoughts drifting up from the quiet. what i got was the feeling that as a human being, i have the ability to be open about what i feel. i can continue to practice my social skills, which do seem to be coming right along and i can be creative with the help of a bit of artificial intelligence. i am worth being relied upon and trusted today, because i have developed a sense of self that includes more that getting the next fix or hit of dopamine, just for today.
∞ DT ∞