Blog entry for:

maybe those added responsibilities at work have got me hopping.
and they have, and i feel quites stressed these days. life is moving way too fast buying a house, swamped with work, and just keeping up with my recovery responsibilities. honestly, i am ready to squeeze some time out of my daily maintenance of my program so i can get a bit more time to make more money. it has been, after all quite a number of days since my last use, so perhaps i have enough recovery to coast a little bit.
the only problem with that line of thought is that i have seen what happens to addicts in recovery when they pursue that particular course of action is that they do not have the sort of recovery that i have come to enjoy. you know, the ability to let go of things i cannot control, the ability to be honest with myself and others, and the ability to accept myself as i am today. although i have yet to do any of these things perfectly, but as long as i do what i have been i have hope that i will continue to these little things that much better.
so with that said, i guess there is no time to squeeze out of my daily maintenance of my recovery program. i have cut back my meeting attendance to the bare minimum, i have let go of service commitments as they expired. so to ditch morning meditation and prayer, evening inventories and prayer, working with my sponsees and sponsor, and doing my step work just has to stay, no matter how much time it consumes. life in recovery may be hectic, but it will not get any less hectic if i decide to coast, in fact it may become worse and that is not a chance i am willing to take, at least just for today.

∞ DT ∞