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now imagine the problems that come along with getting everything i want.
well it has been quite a day so far. i woke up at 6:30 and could not settle back in. sure i have tons of work to get done today, but an extra hour would have been nice…
…so it goes
so thinking about prayer and asking only for my HIGHER POWER’s will for me, is a very good topic to ponder on a day where i get an early start and an early end. after all, all i wanted was a late start, and perhaps i could have prayed for the desire to sleep in, but i have learned that what i want and what i need are often not the same thing. the gift i got for an early start is more time with the woman i love and less of an afternoon slaving on unfinished projects. i can accept that right now, and the the examples that were given in the reading were not all that outrageous, i have first hand experience in getting exactly what i pray for. i prayed for a relationship and got a dawg. i tried again and got three more sponsees, so i have decided to listen and feel instead of beg and plead. the problem with praying for what i think i want is that i seldom am ready to accept the consequences of those gifts. not being prepared for consequences has finally stopped me in my tracks when i start to go down this path. the other problem i have developed over the course of my recovery about praying for what i want is that, as i grow, so does the concept of what my HIGHER POWER is. i no longer view that concept as some sort of santa claus, so it just does not feel right to ask for things i think i want. my FAITH has grown to the point that i generally believe that i will receive exactly what i need, when i need it, even if i do not want it! so back to work and into the mundane world once again.

∞ DT ∞