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powerlessness when someone i sponsor relapses or acts out, is not something i like to look at, EVER. at least, i no longer take on their actions as a reflection of who i am or what i do. in fact my esteem is not based on their behavior at all, anymore. i truly love the men i sponsor, even those on the edge of my tolerance level, which currently is the one that may or may not be a man that i sponsor. i do my best not to judge them and certainly forgive them their human failings. most of them are at a point in their recovery that they do not consume a whole lot of my time. in my opinion, the ones who should be asking for time, are the ones that are not. it is what it is, and it is time for me to move on.
on no, do not get me wrong, i have never moved on from any sponsee, they have always fired me first, either by leaving the program, relapsing or finding someone they with whom they are more comfortable. i know i can be a hard-ass and a traditionalist when it comes to a program of recovery. i do not believe in “cookie-cutter” recovery, BUT i certainly believe in the results of each step, as it works me and the men i sponsor. i watch for the signs, i listen for the revelations and i attempt to guide them to the answer they already know. more times than not, it is the next right thing to do.
i am, anyhow, out of words to put down in this exercise. right here and right now, it is time to pack this in, post it to the interwebs and get ready to head on out for an afternoon of cigars and football. it is a good day to be clean and perhaps, spend some time with one of the men i sponsor, who has become a very good friend.

∞ DT ∞